The ‘When Harry Met Sally’ Super Bowl spot should leave mayo on the the (way)side

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In a move everyone saw coming, the Billy Crystal and Meg Ryan-teased When Harry Met Sally reunion is not a sequel but a Super Bowl spot. But just in case you thought the mature versions of the two lovebirds were pitching something like a new karaoke machine or a dating app for reconnecting with frenemies, I must warn you it is far worse.

The ad takes place at Katz’s Deli, the scene of a famed fake orgasm, with a 20-second teaser showing us a beleaguered waitress reading off an order so persnickety, it could only be the work of one Sally Albright.

“One turkey on rye, but only if it’s fresh, if it’s not fresh then on white bread, but then it’s toasted,” the server reads back. “Two whole lettuce leaves, paper thin tomatoes, one sour pickle sliced lengthwise, so every bite has a bit of pickle, and some Hellmann’s mayonnaise.”

A familiar voice chimes in to say that the mayo has to come — and this is a big thing with her — “on the side.”

Now, when I first learned that this spot would be for mayo and set at Katz’s I began dashing off a letter to the usual antisemitism watchdogs. Sports’ biggest night should not be normalizing the wanton use of this condiment at Jewish eateries.

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But hearing Sally’s order, I mellowed. Had it been pastrami or corned beef, I’d be out in the streets. Turkey is acceptable — though, if you do place an  order with mayonnaise on Katz’s website it adds the judgmental parenthetical “if you must.”

Reviewing Sally’s food particulars in the film — apple pie, Bloody Marys, chef salads — she does not appear to have ordered anything with mayo (she did appear to order a turkey sandwich at Katz’s, per a TastingTable article, on white, not rye) but that doesn’t mean she wouldn’t try.

Unlike Harry, who, by virtue of casting, is Jew-coded, Sally may not know the ins-and-outs of the Jewish preference for spicy mustard — or, for turkey, maybe a nice Russian dressing and some coleslaw, if not straight mayo. Or, perhaps more likely, a person who feigned sexual ecstasy at the crowded restaurant, doesn’t care much for these mores to begin with.

Though the waitress rolls her eyes, it doesn’t seem to be about the Hellmann’s so much as the baroque list of other demands.

As Sally would say, pressed by Harry over her “high maintenance” preferences: “I just want it the way I want it.”

That’s all well and good, but I won’t have what she’s having.

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